Funny Things Men Should Not Do

I’ve started to compile a little list in my head about things I believe men should not do to women, regardless of being in a relationship or not.  Here are my thoughts (and pet peeves) that I have found from being in relationships myself and being friends with many, many men.

1. If we ask you how we look in an outfit, you don’t have to always tell us we don’t look fat . . . be honest.  Just don’t be brutally honest to the point where you hurt our feelings.  There is a way to say what you think in a rational and compassionate way.  Instead of just saying “That makes your ass look HUGE, honey!  Huge like an elephant’s ass huge!”, give us an alternative.  Try something like, “I’m not too sure I really like those pants/jeans on you, but you know which ones look really good?” . . . and describe said pants/jeans here.
2. If we get our hair colored in cut in such a manner that you despise, don’t stare at it and smirk with that stupid, funny grin you all have.  I’m sure we’ll find out eventually that you don’t like it, so I’m pretty sure we’ll get the hint and change it.  However, jokes such as “You look 47 (when you’re only 25) with that color” or “You and your mom could pass as twins now!” or “Where did you get that style from?  The 70s?” are cruel and unnecessary.
3. If we have friends who are men, GET OVER IT.  It’s gonna happen.  As long as there is a trust factor between you and your woman, there should be no problem.  We’re strong enough to banter off the guy we’ve been friends with for ten years easier than that guy who’s staring at us from across the bar.
4. If we ask you to do something, we don’t tend to mean tomorrow, or next week.  We mean within the next five minutes.  So I suggest you get off your lazy ass that’s been in front of the television all day and do it!
5. When we argue, don’t raise your voice or point, especially if we don’t do it to you.  It only makes us blow up even more.  I understand this is a defense mechanism and most of you men do it to make us shut up, but it really doesn’t make us shut up.  It just makes us want to argue more.  If you talk to us civilly about issues, I promise they’ll get resolved much easier, quicker and without as many hurtful things said.
6. If there’s a dishwasher in the house and the dishes in it aren’t clean, put your dirty dishes in there.  Don’t just lie them in the sink expecting us to do it for you.  Seriously?  That’s just plain laziness.
7. If we want to leave, don’t block the exit way.
8. If you want to talk to us, don’t just show up at our doorways pounding on the door.  Completely obliterated.  And not remember that you were there scaring us shitless only ten minutes later . . . (yes, true story.  Did happen.  That whole explanation is for another post, though!).
9. Don’t tell us “I’m only have one drink tonight”.  We know that’s a lie right from the start.  And if you’re going to get drunk, don’t come home.  We don’t want to smell the beer seeping from every pore in your body.  Not to mention we don’t want to deal with any aftermath if there is one.
10. If you’re just a friend, don’t sit there and tell us all about your singlehood adventures.  We really don’t want to hear about it.  Mainly because it makes us wallow in our own singlehood . . . or lack thereof.
11. When we’re trying to have an intimate conversation with you, turn off the television and put down your Blackberry.  I promise that the world will carry on as usual without those items at the tip of your fingers.  We like to know we’re being acknowledged and listened to.

I’m sure I’ll be adding more as I think about them because this may very well just become a sticky post.

Ladies, what other things out there have men done that you would like to let them know to change?

And men, you can put in your input, too!

Oh yeah, and don’t forget to still enter my giveaway!

Tagged as: arguments, friendship, love, marriage, men, relationships, women